childish

there is a good way of being childish and a bad way
tonight it was bad.
i lost it.
i freaked out on the bitch and I only freaked out half way instead of sticking to it. at least i would have had a genuine freak out but i didn't. i stopped, but too late and that's how I found myself in the round of jolly stupid idiots who do the paris hilton/nicole richie/ lindsay lohan and who else not thing and start a bitchy fight.
i wish *sigh* that girls were like guys and would just punch each other a couple of times and then go drink a beer together. seriously.
so it is official, i had a fight with the bitch and i don't really want to deal with it, i mean the consequences of it. fuck man. really. i am so stupid. it s kind of disappointing but then again, i never said i WAS grown up, you know?
i really have to try hard to grow up though.
i am in the midst of it.
and it is so annoying. i wish i could be a nine year old again.