last night

I never thought it would happen that way. Never thought, in fact, that I would ever feel what I felt nor that I would be so calm.
I am awfully detached and float through space like a gas filled balloon.
So I listen to a song that will make me feel.
But some of them have already lost their power.
So I am listening to 'Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay' by Otis Redding. It instantly beams me back to San Francisco. The days and night there, especially the mornings.
This is when I cried my heart out, not knowing that things would happen the way they happened but most certainly I felt pain wash away over me like a tsunami wave.
You whispered into the phone that I held clutched to my ear like a crazy person.
'We are drifting apart'
It was drifting.
And I wondered whether that stream was that strong or the lake so calm. When does one drift?
Is it that we are all drowning, trying to hold onto branches to stay afloat?
I always like swimming against the stream. To get to the origins of things. The well. Fish, my friends.

So you left and I stayed and I waited.
And now you say that I changed. And that you love me. And you always have and you always will. And the sun rises and sinks every day. And plants grow, just like us. And they die.
And wondering into the blue lost sky we ask secretely 'will we see each other again?'
will we see each other the way we saw each other?
with the eyes of a lover?