Kim was actually the main reason why I decided not to go back into a relationship. Well, lets say he was the actuator who triggered the decision which was hovering in the air anyways. I met him the second time in 'Deep', a very fascinating electroclub in Berlin where we danced like crazy the whole night. When we got out of the club the sun was already rising, it felt like coming out of hell into heaven...the birds where singing and we decided to have breakfast together. It was a beautiful february snowy morning, the sun glistered and twinkled on the snow, our eyelashes where covered by white crystalls. We went to my dorm and I was so excited that I even couldn't eat really. We had a fascinating conversation, mainly about art and love and also about relationships and philosophy.
Matter of fact, this morning asserted me in not going back into a relationship and also that it is perfectly allright if I wouldn't.We walked back through the sun to the trainstation. The silence and the words were just too beautiful to be described here. My heart regained energy and I saw: ThIS IS WHAT I WANT. I want procreative, prolific relationships, I want to have sex on an artistic level, I want to be challeneged and I want to be free to take every chance that life offers me. I don't want to be bound. And although Kim's attitude towards relationships might be in itself problematic, for me it was the best that could have happened to me and it opened me up to a world which I always wanted to be in. He showed me how to, by simply being there. We haven't seen each other much ever since but thats not relevant at all. He was the key to the door. Thank you Kim, I will always love you for that. When he left we kissed good bye. It was as dreamy a kiss as had been the whole morning. Miraculous
2 comments:
What a nice blog...What i learned from men is to love me, life and my friends. in that order.
Love is the one thing that can transport you to another level...it is a nice feeling, isn't it? And scary too...well at least when you get older it is.
The clubbin' sounded fun though oooh! i'd love that!
i lived in germany for 3 years. Spangdalem (*SP?) or Bitburg
I absolutely agree with you tanya! it is scary and it is elevating....
what did you in germany???
hm.. i guess i gotta go back to your blog and ask you there. ;-)
thanks for stepping by
jay
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